Mr. Young's ..... reply
Dear “Shaky” Mr. Dooley:
Thank You for taking the time to respond to my company’s inquiry for additional labor. I would first like to thank you for your service. I have a deep respect for Veterans and their service to our country. It appears you may have a slight handicap having a “knickname” Shaky as a demolition expert. You remind me of my Great Grand Pappy in the Civil War “Knick Name” Fumbles. He dropped out of school in the 3rd grade to help his father in the family fireworks business. His father was a full blooded Chinese man that came to the Colonies in the hopes of getting started in the fireworks business. Just as luck would have it the country split and he joined the Confederate Army in the hopes of supplying gunpowder to the South. He got the “knick name” fumbles on his 13th birthday after mistakenly lighting several firecrackers for birthday candles. He lost several body appendages and never was the same after his birthday.
I know full well first hand how difficult it is to only lift a few pounds a one time I myself I grew up with a silver spoon in my mouth and never lifted anything heaver than a bottle of beer Light Beer as a matter of fact Your five minute break every 10 minutes pretty much falls in line with the standards President Obama is setting.
Shaky, my Great Grand Pappy had a lot of your similarities in the fact he was pretty most as worthless as you appear to be. I’ve spent a lifetime trying how to get by with the least amount of work in every capacity imaginable. Just from your resume I have a good feeling you can give me some new ideas on just how to beat the system and do less with more.
Please contact my staff regarding your application highlighting your limitations.
Craig Young
President
