In view of recent security breaches at the White House, Obama named a new Security Chief, Alfred E. Neuman, who will take over the duties immediately.
Obama was quoted saying, "Now that I look back at all those photographs, that incident scares the hell out of me. I shook hands with them, they got that close, and no one knew who they were. One of them could even have had the flu. They walked right in, through the metal detectors, met everyone, had pictures taken with everyone, shook hands with the first black president of the United States. I think the reason they didn't do anything to me is that he is a Muslim terrorist. Tareq is pretty good though, maybe we should get him on the security staff."
Michaele and Tareq Salahi, were not available for comment, they were meeting with their agent, who is making arrangements for all their TV appearances. Michaele, who is anorexic will appear on the Oprah show as soon as arrangements can be made, and they both will appear on either the Letterman or Leno show, whichever bids the highest. Ellen is scheduled for later this week.
Celebrity Digs has them down for a Christmas segment, which gives them time to purchase a new more elaborate home with their earnings from their appearances.
Tareq, apparently, has to return to his home sometime soon to complete a tour of duty with Al-Qaeda. He was recently released from Guantanamo on an Early Work Release Program instituted by Obama. Ironic that he showed up at the White House to thank the man who had gotten him out of prison.
