Porno Films are snapping back TinC

My latest spoof article ............. the vote actually happened, I made up the rest ...

Los Angeles County voters recently passed a ballot initiative mandating that pornographic film actors wear condoms during sex scenes, prompting J. Thorton Skinner, Executive Secretary of PORN, a trade group, to state, "We won't take this frontally. we have various positions we can take, and we intend to explore all of them."

Squeeze Memore, porn star stated, "I am allergic to latex, and lamb intestine gives me a rash and in this line a work, a horrible red rash does not photograph well."

Skinner went on to say, "Filming,  ah well, what I am trying to say is that, sometimes in a movie like these, the "last" thing to happen is sometimes highlighted and well, it is a sensitive area, so to speak, and it can happen that wearing the condom, well the thing they do when that happens, well, it just is not there, confined in that condom, regardless of the type. Whew."

The Los Angeles County District Attorney expressed concern on how the new law would be enforced. He indicated that their budget did not allow for any additional personnel and that policing this law would be relegated to present personnel. Chief Beck indicated that already, 2,135 policemen had volunteered.

The porn industry generates large tax revenue dollars for the county, and this new law may cause the industry to find another location where condoms are not mandated. Apparently they have made inquiries about possible facilities in Oregon, where the movie "Free Willy" was filmed.

This is a SPOOF Article - Tongue In Cheek - NOT TRUE

Documents recently released revealed that so-called FEMA Concentration Camps actually were being used by underground movie producers to film pornographic movies. Joe Conforte, long time Nevada brothel owner, and more recently owner of the Mustang Ranch was cordinating the entire operation from his secluded Argentina home. Denis Hof, Hugh Hefner and fomer Vice President Al Gore were also involved in the creation and operation of these facilities.


When contacted in Argentina by a UPS reporter, Conforte stated, "The dumb public will believe anything we want them to. They have no idea what is going on. Concentration camps, who came up with that dumb idea. Hef mentioned something about what they might believe, but who would have thought they were that gullible. All those damn black tubs they were worried about were used to sneak the girls and equipment in and out."

Reportedly, the revenue from the movies is paying FEMA for the facilities and there is no cost to the taxpayers for any of the concentration camps, much like the wheelchair commercial states, "At no cost to me."

One big boost to the operation came with the acquisition of "stimulus" money from the Obama administration. A the three billion dollar, non-repayable loan, accelerated their expansion plans and gave the organization the capital needed to complete their goals.

The next time you watch a porn film, give a silent thanks to the government for supplying all of the facilities around the country where they were able to film in absolute seclusion.

This is where it is displayed on my SPOOF SITE