An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, 'When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!'
Neighbours feared him. They believed he practiced magic, because of the many strange occurrences that took place in their neighbourhood. The old man liked the fact that he was feared. ---To every one's relief, he died of a heart attack when he was 98.
His wife had a closed casket at the wake. After the burial, she went straight to the local bar and began to party, as if there was no tomorrow.
Her neighbours, concerned for her safety, asked, 'Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?'
The wife put down her drink and said, 'Let him dig. I had him buried upside down. And you know men won't ask for directions.'
Thomas Jefferson said in 1802: "I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies."
"The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not."-- Thomas Jefferson
"When in danger or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout." .... jbd
"When once a job you have begun, do no stop till it is done. Whether the task be great or small, do it well, or not at all." .... Anon
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. - Albert Einstein
Television is one daylong commercial interrupted periodically by inept attempts to fill the airspace in between them.If you can't start a fire, perhaps your wood is wet ....
When you elect clowns, expect a circus ..............